Dangerous illusions

Since couple of days, I have been listing down number of topics that I can write for this blog. These, as I may say so, are day-to-day occurrences and consequences. Alas! I really regret the fact that the list has been always made in my mind. Thanks to my short-term memory, due to which I fail to type them in morning. So, I decided to select the topic only in morning, while venturing to my work-station.

It all happened when I was making my way from Metro theatre to office. I idiotically had a collision with a bicycle. It was my mistake and I admit it. I could see the bicycle goading towards me at full speed, yet, I stood there like the Statue of Liberty (she is the only lady effigy I can remember). Why did I stand there like a fool? Well, that is the story and it starts some years back… fade out (can’t get rid of my filmy touch).

I met a guy, Ashish (name changed) for the first time in my sister’s engagement party. Since then we had been pretty close friends. We talked with each other for hours on phone. I had no “love” for him at all even then. We were just good friends. No boy was ever so friendly with me as he was. Being an adolescent, I was vulnerable to the situation (not physically, but mentally), and so, I thought it was like a film, and we were friends forever. But this was not to last very long. Like a usual scenario - there were misunderstandings, fights, unpleasant occurrences between the two of us. This was mainly due to my inclination towards career, which he did not quiet appreciate and I stepped out of the cocoon to experience the new world, where people like Ashish were described as nothing but a male chauvinist pig. This just added to the situation and I realized how fragile it was. It made me coerce to leave him and move forward. Later, since he belonged to my community, he started spreading rumors about me. Soon he understood I was least affected by any of those and everything finally ended. This I now describe as the worst period of my life and my biggest mistake. So what this story has to do with the tiny accident I had with the bicycle today?

Hmmm…I was listening to one of his favorite songs, unfortunately happen to be my preferred one too, and was suddenly dragged into the past. Being a scriptwriter, things often come to life when I am thinking something, as if I was watching a film. I was not aware of the surrounding and that is exactly the moment, “bang”, the bicycle came and knocked me off. Well, the rider had all the rights to abuse me, as I was standing in the middle of the road staring at him but not even moving by and itch. But you see I am a girl and he really couldn’t do anything. Neither of us spoke a word and departed continuing our journey.

Sometimes, unconsciously though, we jeopardize our lives for someone who does not even matter to us in slightest of its sense. But when we think about them, our mind takes us to another plateau, where things are not like the way we see them, and yet, we are compelled to believe their existence. What happened today was not in my control. So I cannot blame myself for it. Ashish or the bicycle riders were too not at fault. Yet what happened could have been graver than just a passing by affair.